Thursday, August 29, 2013

The Stress of Photographing My Own Kids

Have you ever noticed that no one ever looks like such a goober as when they are playing with a baby? Even staid and serious people will make faces, weird noises, and speak in unintelligible, high pitched, so-cute-you-could-vomit, voices.

I have to admit, I am one of those people.

If an innocent bystander happened to see my behavior and not notice the baby I am making goo-goo eyes at, they would certainly question my sanity. I make a general ass of myself and, to be quite honest, I don't really care. Baby's are cute, man! And, naturally, no mother thinks any baby is as cute as her own baby.

Thus, I spent an evening photographing my Jackson, who is 6 months old. Photographing a baby is like regular baby adoring behavior x2. Almost like hopping on a one way train to Goobersville and visiting every stop on the way. I think the silliness is compounded by the pressure to "get the shot." Even when the kid is MY kid, I still feel the pressure. That makes me anal, I guess, but I don't lower my standards just because no one is paying me.
In fact, it is almost worse because it IS my kid and I can imagine folks looking at the photos and thinking to themselves, "Well if she can't even get a decent shot of her own kid..."

So I have to shake myself and look myself in the eye and say, "Woman, these photos are going to be a physical reminder of what your last baby looked like, and what his personality was like. You aren't saving the world, here. Calm down. You love your kid. You'll love the photos, and that will show with the end result. Now quit talking to me, and start pressing the shutter."

Okay, that was a little dramatic, but my internal conversations can get fairly interesting.

With  no further rambling about my psyche, I will get straight to the mommy-bragging.

Isn't Jackson too stinking adorable!?

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